Goodbye

Im writing this to you because I know you may read it and because I need to say how I feel. Lately I've been confused. Confused af. Afraid. Afraid because I was again in front of such a big and dangerous world alone. And when I say alone , I mean not with you. I didn't have you there to tell me everything was going to be alright.

And I know I'm strong because I kept living when I wanted to die. I kept fighting but I don't even know why anymore. You used to be my reason.

And now I know. I have to say goodbye to you. I know we already did it but not in my mind. In my head you are still here, stuck. So yes. Goodbye. I need to accept you are my past. I will make my own way. without you. And it probably will hurt for a long time. But I promess I'll be doing better everyday. With every step, with every breath, you will be far away.

Thanks for everything you gave me. Thank you even for the pain, now I'm  stronger. I can't say I won't fall in love again. But I can say I won't love anyone as I loved you. And no one will love you as I did.

Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend.