Goodbye

Im writing this to you because I know you may read it and because I need to say how I feel. Lately I've been confused. Confused af. Afraid. Afraid because I was again in front of such a big and dangerous world alone. And when I say alone , I mean not with you. I didn't have you there to tell me everything was going to be alright.

And I know I'm strong because I kept living when I wanted to die. I kept fighting but I don't even know why anymore. You used to be my reason.

And now I know. I have to say goodbye to you. I know we already did it but not in my mind. In my head you are still here, stuck. So yes. Goodbye. I need to accept you are my past. I will make my own way. without you. And it probably will hurt for a long time. But I promess I'll be doing better everyday. With every step, with every breath, you will be far away.

Thanks for everything you gave me. Thank you even for the pain, now I'm  stronger. I can't say I won't fall in love again. But I can say I won't love anyone as I loved you. And no one will love you as I did.

Goodbye my lover. Goodbye my friend.

Asco

Me da asco ver cómo tras haber un terremoto de 7,5, un secuestro de 250 niñas nigerianas por el Boko Haram, atentados en Turquía casi mensualmente y etc, sólo nos importa que lleva puesto Kim Kardahian o quien gana la Eurocopa.

Me da asco la sociedad. Formo parte de ella así que me doy asco también. Lo peor es que quiero hacer algo y me siento impotente. No quiero decir que no puedo pero lo siento así. Y me odio por sentirlo.

Desearía que prestáramos más atención a las víctimas habidas cada día por yihadistas, aunque NO SEA EN EUROPA, que a los goles marcados por Neymar.

Y lo peor de todo, es que más tarde iremos por ahí diciendo cuánto nos importan estos temas y cuán humanos somos. Pero espera cinco segundos, que en cuanto salga el tema sobre el cotilleo más comentado del momento, nadie hablará ya de eso. Ni si quiera parecerá que conversas con la misma persona.

Somos unos hipócritas.

Idc

They say time fixes everything. I would like to believe that. But I'm so freaking scared thinking I may never forget you. Never stop feeling this pain. Never stop missing you. I get so cared thinking you may move on but I'll stay here stuck...

I'm scared . And you used to be the one I told all this things to feel better. You always calmed me down. The problem is this is now about you. And how can I deal with that? I never thought you would be in my "why life sucks reasons" just in my "why to stay alive reasons".

Is a sad lonely night

Its a sad lonely night. Even stars seem to cry up there. You told me goodbye and this time could be forever. Sorry for loving you too much. Sorry for everything. I'm not telling you I'm sorry I'm saying it to myself. Because I lied myself again saying that I could trust someone for once. And I knew I couldn't. Everybody leaves. EVERYBODY. I knew it and I let myself hurt. Because I'm stupid. because I'm horrible. Because I'm me.

No tengo miedo

No tengo miedo de viajar por todo el mundo. Pero quiero hacerlo contigo. Quiero recorrer cada ciudad, cada pueblo, a tu lado. Subir a las cimas más altas, hacer paracaidismo, ver anochecer en los puntos menos imaginados del planeta. Quiero navegar contigo, escalar el cañón de colorado, ver las Cataratas del Niagara, cumplir mi sueño y ver la Aurora Boreal. Pero contigo. Quiero que seas tu el que vea cuando me gire. El que me guíe cuando me pierda en el camino. En el que me apoye cuando crea que no puedo más.  Me has dado esperanza. Esperanza de que todo esto merezca la pena. Ahora, acompañame. No te defraudare si no me abandonas. Lo prometo.